*SOLD* Amethyst art glass, Fenton rose bowl: $20

Dear Brain,

Please understand that I respect and love you, and have been trying to do well by you in recent months, providing classic literature (via Kobo, yay free books), and ingesting PBS documentaries and NPR radio programmes as much as possible. Therefore, I would like to humbly request that you cooperate with me, and turn off the pulsing section dedicated entirely towards identifying ANYTHING as a potential "wedding colour scheme."

I was trying to write about how pretty the vintage glass art piece (pictured above, and below) is, but you are making it very difficult to do so, because you insist on blaring the following alarm: "Amethyst. Cream. Brass. Crystal. PERFECT WEDDING COLOUR SCHEME!"

You and I both know, the wedding was almost a year and a quarter ago, so I'm simply asking you to make an effort. Perhaps as a transitional method, you can replace the word 'wedding' with '5 year anniversary', thus reducing both the frantic and the incorrect overtones of your favourite feverish phrase.

Love, omega fatty acids, and some quality time with the Norton Anthology of English Literature,


PS: Amethyst art glass rose bowl, by Fenton, 5" tall, 7" in diameter, would make a lovely wedding (argh) 5th anniversary (we can't keep it!) party piece, especially as part of a candy buffet, or centerpiece (with candles!), or as a place for your (wedding/anniversary/SPECIAL EVENT) guests to leave handwritten postcards filled with well wishes for your future (together in married bliss...oh, I give up!)



Post a Comment